Please stop doing this

We are all doing it.  Well most of us are.  The few that are not?  They are thriving and feeling incredible, even during a pandemic-politically charged- the sky is falling- time in history.

What is it?

Immersing ourselves in media.  Whether it be the news or social media.  We are addicted to it.  We wake up and immediately grab our phones and start scrolling.  We turn on the tv as we are getting ready.  We listen to it on the way to work.  We chronically scroll throughout our work day.  We listen to it on the way home from work. We turn on the tv and listen to it as we make dinner.  We lay in bed and scroll away.

Sound familiar? 

Here is the problem:  it is hurting your mental health.  

As humans we need to feel connected.  We are social creatures (even those that are introverts still need to feel as if they COULD be connected, and/or they connect with those they feel safe & comfortable with).   It is one of the main reasons the lock down has had such tremendous impacts to our mental health (and btw when our mental health struggles..so does our immune system).   

We need the companionship of others to thrive in life, and the strength of our connections has a huge impact on our mental health and happiness. Being socially connected to others can ease stress, anxiety, and depression, boost self-worth, provide comfort and joy, prevent loneliness, and even add years to your life.

And we have come to a sad belief that we can get this ‘connection’ through social media.  I am here to tell you the opposite happens.  Is it a cool way to stay up to date with family and friends from around the world?  Yes.  Barely.

But what more and more studies are finding is that heavy social media usage is directly linked to increased risk of depression, anxiety, loneliness, self-harm and suicidal thoughts.  And we are just now scratching the surface on these studies.  Don’t get me started on what social media is doing to our teens and children- the results are so scary y’all.   

And here is something else that is scary: Social media has a reinforcing nature. Using it activates the brain’s reward center by releasing dopamine, a “feel-good chemical” linked to pleasurable activities such as sex, food, and social interaction. The platforms are designed to be addictive and yet the results of this addiction is just as damaging to our psyche as some of the hardest drugs available today.  Not to mention the amount of TIME we waste scrolling through other peoples lives.  

Add this onto watching the news- you have the perfect recipe for complete mental health deterioration.  I mean- when is the last time you watched the news and smiled?  Or felt good from the information you received from it?  And if you are one of the ones who will say, “The news doesn’t bother me at all,  I just want to stay informed”- I am gonna say HOGWASH.  It subconsciously is working on your perspective and point of view.  It is manipulating you to believe negative things about certain demographics, issues, etc.  It is taking away your ability to choose love first, to choose joy, to find the good in others.  And what in the hell do you want to stay informed of?  Trust me, turn off the news and you will still be as informed as you need to be.  Just pick your head up from your phone and pay attention to what is around you.  The real world.  With real people.    

Yes I know there are still real fears going on in the world, there is still separation for health reasons or otherwise.  But there are some things you can do to TURN OFF THE NOISE and tune into real life while also improving your health.  Here are some tips to do just that.  

How to turn off the noise:

• Delete the apps from your phone.  I know I know.  Don’t cry yet.  I already know that most (if not all) of you will not get rid of social media altogether.  But we can manage it more efficiently and minimize some of the impact/damage.  Start by deleting it off your phone.  Then set a schedule.  You will check it twice a day via a computer only (or via the browser on your phone- we are trying to make it a bit harder).  Once AFTER you get out of bed, dressed and ready, and then once before dinner (not at bedtime).  Set a timer on your phone and don’t spend more than 2.5 minutes scrolling for a total of 5 minutes a day. 

• Clean up your feed.  Start muting people on your social media that stir up negative feelings and emotions.  Muting doesn’t notify the user so you don’t have to worry about drama or conflict (of course you are welcome to just unfollow or unsubscribe too).   Get rid of even the feeds that are political/socially charged that you even AGREE with. It still stirs up resentment and issues with the OPPOSITE of what you agree with and what is the point of that?  Clean up your feed so that when you do spend that 5 minutes a day on it, you still feel good about humanity when you get off it. 

• Turn off the news.  Yes babe, turn it off.  There ain’t nothing good on there and there ain’t nothing that you HAVE to know. Not even about COVID, or politics or whatever. All it will do is make you sad, mad or afraid.  Seriously.  What other purpose will it serve in your life today?    Side note: my husband and I haven’t really watched the news since the start of COVID and we still find out what is really necessary to know, without all the perverse drama/fear mongering/bullshit that is being spread around on the news.  And whatever we don’t know?  Well, we obviously don’t need to know it and it hasn’t impacted our lives negatively one bit.  Quite the opposite actually. 

I am curious: will you choose your health? Or will you choose media?   You CAN control how you feel, and this is the NUMBER ONE WAY TO CHANGE HOW YOU FEEL FOR THE BETTER, today.  Instantly.   All within your control.  You don’t need anyone’s help in this.  Not a dr, not a significant other, not a parent, not a boss.  You 100% can control how you feel, instantly.  

And not only will this help your mental health- it strengthens your immune system as well.  That is because when you are feeling better mentally, it stops releasing all the fear/anger chemicals into your blood stream that has been compromising your immune systems ability to function.  It reduces inflammation, stops the constant injection of cortisol and adrenaline and starts releasing other feel good chemicals as well as allowing your parasympathetic system to finally kick in (the rest and digest system).  

So… what will you choose?

PS, have you seen the documentary Social Dilemma?  It might help you make your decision.